Astrology can provide insights into the timing of your soulmate’s arrival in your life by examining the transits and progressions of the planets in your birth chart. Aries meets their soulmate around the age of 25, a time when they are still maturing and trying to figure themselves out. This is also a crucial time for their soulmate to see them exactly as they are.
To calculate your friendship compatibility, enter your birthdate, birthtime, and present location into the “When Will I Meet My Soulmate Astrology Calculator”. The tool will examine your birth chart and offer insights into possible times when you will find your soulmate. Astrology topics include predicting love relationships and marriage, and understanding the signs of your zodiac sign’s horoscope.
In 2022, the yearly friendship horoscope describes what the new year has in store for each zodiac sign’s social life. Sign and house positions of planets are not an indicator of unreliable friends, as everyone born at around the same time would have such signs.
Taureans form great friendships and watch out for their friends at all times. They are never afraid of giving out tough love if the situation needs it. In today’s world, having no or very few genuine friends is a reality, so it is important to analyze our friends or the lack of them astrologically.
Setting boundaries is an act of self-care, and finding balance in every friendship is essential. Astrology may once again take center stage, but it is important to consider different tools in one’s toolbox to ensure a fulfilling relationship with their soulmate.
📹 11 Psychic Signs Someone Is Constantly Thinking Of You
Is someone constantly thinking of you? If so, they might be sending you psychic signs. Watch this video to learn how to read these …
Which planet is responsible for friends?
Saturn and Mars are two distinct planets in astrology, with Saturn being the planet of enemies and Mars being the planet of friends. Both planets have unique characteristics and energy, making them both important in astrology. Saturn is considered the planet of enemies due to its opposite nature, while Mars is considered the planet of friends. Both planets have a significant influence on our lives, making it crucial to understand their relationship.
The podcast “ASTROLOGY with ALOK”!! – season -1 provides more information on Saturn and Mars’ relationship in astrology. Understanding these planets is essential for a deeper understanding of their impact on our lives.
Which zodiac are true friends?
Zodiac signs play a significant role in our lives, offering insights into various aspects of our lives, including compatibility in friendships. Astrology is a fun and intriguing way to explore the dynamics of human connections. Some of the most compatible and nurturing companions in friendships include Aries and Gemini, who are considered the perfect match for each other. Aries brings fiery energy, while Gemini adds intellectual spark. Together, they go on exciting adventures and never run out of things to talk about.
In terms of news, lifestyle, relationships, and love-sex, these Zodiac signs become amazing best friends. Astrology is not a definitive science, but a fun and intriguing way to explore the dynamics of human connections.
Can astrology predict an ex coming back?
Astrology provides insight into the likelihood of an ex-partner’s return through birth charts, compatibility analysis, and current transits. Consulting an astrologer can offer personalized guidance, but it’s crucial to prioritize emotional well-being and make decisions aligned with personal growth and happiness. Astrology helps gain clarity, empowering individuals to move forward with confidence and self-awareness. Follow us on Instagram for interesting astrology videos.
How to find a missing person through astrology?
The individual in question will return if Jupiter is in the sixth or seventh house, Mercury and Venus are in trines, or if the Sun, Mercury, and Venus are in the eleventh house, with benefics in kendras and the lagna lord situated between the eleventh and fourth houses.
Which zodiac signs will go back to their ex in 2024?
In the year 2024, four astrological signs indicate the possibility of reunions with former romantic partners. Those born under the astrological signs of Cancer, Scorpio, and Capricorn may find themselves experiencing a particular sense of nostalgia, forgiveness, and a desire for balance and stability, respectively. These astrological signs are engaged in a process of exploring the potential for relationships, with a willingness to consider all possibilities.
How do you contact someone who is missing?
To report a missing person, call the police and provide information about the person’s whereabouts. They may ask questions, so it’s advisable to write down answers beforehand. If speaking to the police is difficult or uncertain about the person’s safety, contact a helpline for information, support, and a listening ear. The helpline can launch an appeal for the missing person, as long as the police have an open investigation. They are also available to listen to concerns, wait with the person, and connect them with others who understand their feelings.
Can astrology predict friendship?
Astrology provides insights into the compatibility of different zodiac signs, which can help in understanding strengths and challenges in long-distance friendships. By knowing each other’s sun, moon, and rising signs, communication styles and emotional needs can be navigated more effectively. Understanding the zodiac can help bridge the gap in friendships, ensuring strong connections regardless of distance.
Which zodiac signs miss their ex?
The four zodiac signs that are most likely to miss their ex-partner are Cancer, Pluto-ruled Scorpios, Taurus, and Libra. Cancers are sentimental and close to their loved ones, struggling to move on after a breakup due to their extensive investment in relationships. They hold onto memories and idealize the past, making them miss their ex more. Pluto-ruled Scorpios have strong emotions and relationships, but their passion and commitment make it difficult to let go. They may dwell on their ex, battling unresolved feelings and attachments.
Which planet is responsible for isolation?
Ketu, the South Node of the Moon, is a significant celestial point in a person’s birth chart, connecting Rahu and Ketu as the face and tail of the snake respectively. It is associated with detachment, meditation, isolation, intuition, and spirituality. Ketu is generally associated with enlightenment and spiritual development. The Moon’s orbit intersects the ecliptic, not a real planet. Ketu is the only planet linked to these aspects in Vedic Astrology. The article aims to clarify its functions in Vedic Astrology for readers.
Which house shows friendship?
Astrology reveals three houses: the 11th House, the House of Friends, the House of Communication, and the House of Partnership. The 11th House governs social circles, group activities, and associations, offering insights into the nature of friendships we attract and our role within our networks. The 3rd House influences our environment, communication style, and interactions with neighbors and acquaintances, highlighting connections formed through daily interactions and shared interests.
The 7th House governs significant one-on-one relationships, including close friendships, and can provide insights into the qualities we seek in our closest allies and the dynamics that define these relationships.
What signs will always choose each other?
Astrology can provide fun and interesting insights into the best astrological matches for couples. The 12 best astrological matches are Aries and Aquarius, Gemini and Libra, Scorpio and Pisces, Virgo and Taurus, Leo and Sagittarius, Pisces and Cancer, Cancer and Scorpio, and Sagittarius and Aries. These pairings are believed to affect personality traits and play an essential role in relationships. The perfect couple zodiac signs are those who love the sunset, appreciate the little things, and stay up all night to talk about life.
📹 A lack of friends indicates that a person has many…
When a man who had no friends was asked why this happened, he responded, “Friendship is like a diamond. It’s rare, expensive …
There was a time when I thought that I had lots of friends. That was until I was diagnosed with a terminal illness and spent six months in hospital. No visits, phone calls, not even a card. Once I was out of hospital the common excuse was “I hate hospitals”. Yeah well try staying in one for a length of time. It made me realise that these weren’t true friends, just those who hang on for the benefits of someone who’s always there for them. No thanks. Now my best friend is my German Shepherd. He has a terrible history of abuse and neglect. He never had a friend who cared for him. Now he does and he appreciates me. My only hope is that I outlive him. The thought of abandoning him is too much to bear.
I had a friend like this. Called him my best friend and so did he. I helped him through the death of his mom, an always lingering drug addiction, talked him out of psychosis more times then I care to remember, made him a bed, renovated his house, …. He never did anything for me, but I didn’t mind, always thought it wasn’t necessary. He needed peptalk after peptalk and I was there. Gave him good solid usable advice to get his life in order. He always went back to his old ways after promising he d follow the advice on his mom, dad, life,… After years I finally admitted to myself that he was completely self centered, bit crazy even. He lied all the time, believing his own lies. I cut him out of my life. He was using so much of my energy my own life fell apart. If you want, take my advice: act sooner.
I absolutely agree with this. I’m a 64 year old guy who decided more than 10 years ago that I was better off without friends. If I happen to find anyone who has as much integrity and honorable loyalty etc as me, I will reconsider but I’m not holding my breath. Most people take advantage of friends in a very dishonest and unfair way.
I’m an introvert so being alone is fine with me, and I learned at a very young age that most people cannot be depended on. I have very few friends but get along with most everyone. The ones that I can’t, I avoid because I can’t stand their negative energy. Being raised in an abusive family I’m very picky. I live out in the middle of nowhere with my animals and I love it
When my grandfather died at age 82, I was surprised to see so many young people at his funeral. Curious, I asked several young people how they knew my grandfather. They said they would often stop by to see him on their way to and from school. Even when they were young boys and girls at the time, they said he always treated them like adults and honestly listened to their concerns. He always gave them good advice from tips on playing baseball to explaining how to be and have good friends.
When you cut out the toxic relationships and lose the intertwined drama, life is much more peaceful. I quit chasing after unhealthy, disappointing connections (which was usually the end result) and chose to keep more to myself. I’ve been called anti-social or a hermit, but all I know is I’m happier as a hermit. 🤷♀️
i totally agree with this tale. Over the years I have helped many people, it’s in my nature, but when I’ve needed help in return, “I am told, sorry, can’t help” Of course, I do still help people who need help, but i am very careful now. In fact, counting your true friends doesn’t take long. One finger should do it.
I’m 35 and have absolutely no friends. it’s quite boggling, to be honest. i often find myself quite depressed due to my lack of satisfying relationships in life. i don’t know if it’s because of the changing times, or because im getting older, but I’ve found that finding and keeping friends around is not only extremely difficult but very exhausting as well. about 2 years ago, i noticed i was the only person keeping any of my meaningful (to me anyway) relationships in tact i.e. the only person to call, visit, etc., so i decided to stop reaching out and see who would actually reach out to me…. well i have no friends now, lmao. I’ve been trying to get on being alone, and find solitude in that. instead of investing in other people, i’ve invested in me. it still really sucks, and i would love nothing more than a loving family and a couple decent friends, but its not looking like its in the cards for your boy. ill be damned if i disappear into the shadows without being seen, though. the person i was 2 years ago to now is unrecognizable, so i suppose i can hold my head high with that fact.
I find people always let me down or betray me or never put any effort, but I acknowledge that I need to have social connections because I am healthier and happier, so instead of friends I started volunteering in our community, it’s a great group of like minded people enjoying a common goal. Then I go home feel happy and get on with my hobbies and no need for fake friends. It’s a win, win for everyone.
You can be your own best friend and never be lonely. It doesn’t mean you avoid people, you enjoy them for what they are and enjoy their company more because you don’t need it. To do this, you have to begin to look for your worth in your reflection in the mirror, not your reflection in other people’s eyes.
I’ve recently been wondering why, as I am older (mid 20s) I have less friends than I do when I was younger. I thought I was the problem but then I realized anyone who I ever called a “friend” either moved away or, in some form, betrayed me. I thought I was the problem but looking at it now. I believe in loyalty to the most pain-staking degree. I’ll die for people; I just realized that people wont die for me
My biggest insecurity as a teen was that my friends didn’t really like me. I literally did everything to keep them happy… Even things that made me unhappy. Fast forward to now, the only friend I have is my Dog BUT I’m also closer to God, family and honestly myself. Not a bad trade. Being alone isn’t a bad thing, it teaches you so much.
I’m a middle aged women and I’m that apple tree. I no longer trust and want to be friends with anyone. I know a lot of people have lots of negative opinions about me for not having and not wanting to make friends. But I have a few breaths left in my body, and I want to live what remaining life I’ve in peace and happy with my angel daughter, without whom life has no meaning. God spare me from those devil who comes as friends and rips my soul and wounds me. Help me.
I remember a speech by my headmistress when I was around 14. She spoke to the school assembly about friendship. Saying that some people are surrounded by lots of people, some are not. And that if those people surrounded by lots of people seem very popular, it isn’t necessarily true. That a person can only have one or two true friends if they’re lucky! That the seemingly popular people are merely surrounded by acquaintances and not loyal people. That it is impossible to have lots of true friends in life! That always resonated with me. As I’ve grown much older I feel she was very wise and true in her advice! I passed on her wisdom to my growing children!
I’m 59. Over the years,I’ve found that true friends are very rare. There are so many users, narcissists and people who really don’t know what friendship or love is. They take your time, effort, energy and kindness for granted. People show you who they are. Sometimes, we just don’t want to believe it. Letting go of people can sometimes the hardest and the best thing we can do for ourselves. I find that I’m so much happier knowing that I’m cultivating self love by I’m doing what’s best for Me.
At almost 73, I have been alone most of my life because I am a loner by nature. There are people who wanted to be my friend but I enjoyed my own company so much. I think there are mostly good people out there with good values and good intentions that would make wonderful friends. Love yourself first, make your own self happy..then you never depend on others for those things therefore they never fall short and you exclaim, “they are not much of a friend”….the kingdom of heaven is within.
Many years ago, my father said to me: “Son, I’m happy that you have lots of friends and are having a good time, but remember this… if you die with as many true friends as you have fingers on one hand, you’ll die a very wealthy man.” I was young and didn’t really absorb what he meant. But oh boy, did this article ring home and remind me of what my father told me such a long time ago. Later, I helped so many people throughout my life, but….. well, you all know the rest.
This story tells what happens when you’ve been cyclically traumatized by a narcissist (the selfish little boy. . .he never grew up emotionally) the loyal, caring victim (the tree, always empathetic and caring for others) ends up depleted and eventually tossed aside. If you’re fortunate enough to heal after the abuse, your guard is up and boundaries are set. Trauma from a narcissistic abuser or learning NOT to be lonely without friends? I’ll take learning to love myself again and not be lonely without friends. That story is so sad but exactly how some people treat others. . .no love, no respect, no regard, no loyalty. . .just what can you for me, what can I benefit from you. Sickening
I’ve never had many friends because most people are boring. The conversations are limited. They have zero creativity. Everything is a debate- no concept of theorizing. As a child I didn’t understand why the other kids played in the sandbox- “What is the point”. I would wonder. I’d watch the girls be mean for no reason and think “Something is wrong with them “. I couldn’t wait to grow up because “Adults don’t act this way”. Is what I thought. As an adult, I am alone, but never lonely. I’m never bored. I have very few problems. I attribute this to learning early- stay clear of people. And, as an adult I quickly learned that, “No, adults don’t act that way- They are worse”.
I also want to say that it gives me great comfort to hear that other people have experienced the same thing. I always wondered what was wrong with me that I attract at all these jerks. Reading these comments has allowed me to feel relieved that it’s just the way life is and I should NOT take it personally.
❤Very interesting. I am 59 yrs old. I grew up with drug & alcohol-addicted parents who were not very kind. My Dad was a Harly gang member. I have three siblings & we did not get along. Looking at my life, I have always wondered why I feel like others do not like me so much. This article taught me, “Those without friends have many reasons to distrust people”. Humm…I thought about that.. it resonates with me. It reminds me that our perception is our reality. Am I projecting? I don’t know, but it’s worth analyzing. I have trust issues. Self preservation tactic.
As someone who has been an apple tree, and has been let down and disappointed, trust in people isn’t about trusting them, it’s about having enough trust in yourself that you will get over and through anything that a friend can do to you. We are not good to receive good things we are good to receive good feelings, if you are doing being and helping that’s is to feed your soul, it is not to receive the same treatment, those who do you wrong, know they have, don’t give them a chance to justify it will your response to them.. Anger is a gift that you don’t have to accept, if you don’t accept a gift it remains in the givers possession. Be kind, be helpful, be your own friend and befriend those around you. Have some humility, trust you will know when your help has expired. But remember, if you can help, maybe you are the appointed angel sent to do so, we do not all stand straight all the time, remember your blessings and remember your struggles. I find when I walk away from those who need help, that I can provide, I witnessed others walking away from me when I needed help.. The world will react the way you react.. step with purpose step with grace.
I thought I had friends until things got hard, First my husband took his own life and then I became homeless then later in I was told I had lung cancer and that if I didn’t havnt my lung removed I would die. No body came to take care of me on any of these occasions. A few people rang or brought food but this do called circle of friends were to busy they said. Now I’m stronger and I have my 2 dogs who are loyal and loving. I feel like all this adversity has helped me get rid of “The trash” and shown me “The treasure “. X
Another sad thing about this? If you’re younger you might think “how could that happen?” Not realizing, more than half the people you call “friends,” those that you would help no matter the situation, would never do the same in return. When that does happen, you just have to keep in mind that you helped them because they needed it and it was the right thing to do. Don’t overextend yourself and never expect anything from those around you. One day you’ll look up and know: Whoever is left is a real one.
Sadly enough😅 the bigger your heart and compassion, the more knives you’ll receive to either your back or your heart. The more you see, the less you’ll be respected. People will always call you crazy for knowing and seeing thing’s beyond their comprehension. A friend, is a person who accepts who you are and loves you for all your flaws and perks. A friend is the person that stands beside you, where most people would stand in front or behind you.
I can absolutely relate I’ve changed Most of my family turned away from me after my Dad died I had a best friend. He was killed by his son I was grieving and weak. And people who I thought loved me used me, stole from me and abandoned me I will never ha best friend like the one I had for over 30 years. I’m learning to accept it Now I have pigeons for friends and I’m grateful for them rather than fake friends.
My mother told me a couple valuable lessons in life, and one that I’ll never forget,, is when I was about 18 or so and talking about ALL MY FRIENDS,, she said that \tthey are not all your friends, and you will be very lucky if you can count 2 true friends in life after it’s all said and done.. And I’m 53 years old now and she was right.. \tAnd never Piss against the Wind either 😝
Trust people to be who they are. That doesn’t mean you have to deal with them if they show you disloyalty it just means accept that they aren’t worth your time and your peace is way more valuable than a fake friendship. The older I get the less patience I have for bs whether it’s from a friendship, a girlfriend, or anything. We sometimes create fictitious people in our minds of who we want them to be instead of looking at them for who they are.
A person who has few friends is a person who values friendship, has many reasons to pick friends wisely and because trust is so important a person has to be careful who he/she allows into their life. It’s better to have an inner circle of quality people than to have many friends with which some of them might too often sadden, too often disappoint, or too often be frustrating to share thoughts and ideas with. Don’t ya’ have to look out for your own serenity?
Well, I was afraid to click on this…for the very many times everyone comes at me with: “Why dont you have any friends? “Go and call you friends!” “What’s wrong with you that you can’t make and keep friends?”-family members who refuse to be my friend. Believe me. I have SO tried. So incredibly hard. And here I read this story about the Apple tree and I feel that way. I really do. At least maybe someone out there gets it. Thank You! because this made me feel at least a little better. 💐🕊🌺 ~
Man I used to have a lot of friends. Turned to drugs and alcohol cause I felt I wasn’t happy. Lost all my real friends met if bunch of junky so called friends. Been sober and clean 42 months now and I chose to be a loaner. And man I love the lone life. I can do what I want in my own person and don’t have to worry about anyone’s drama or their personal issues. Just do me and man it’s the best sober and happy life I could ever live.
You can be more alone being with people you don’t trust than you can ever be by being alone with yourself. Learning to be your own best friend is a lesson that only wise people learn. The exception to this is friendships with animals, especially dogs. They give unconditional love and are loyal to their people for all their lives.
Being alone isn’t always a bad thing. The silence has taught me that everything I’ve ever looked for in a person, can be found and felt within me. Take a breakup for example: the love shared between the two is never lost with that person, it only feels that way because we associate love with people and possessions. Love cannot be caged nor tamed. I’ve learnt to observe people and the behaviour of man. A lot of people are like the little boy, they need a tree to constantly validate them. As for us trees; don’t stop growing just because you’ve been cut down, continue to grow and produce even sweeter apples, so that anyone who eats from your tree will be filled with endless love, a love that cannot be contained, but only shared. And the next time a boy in need comes your way, look into his eyes (for the eyes are the windows to the soul) and feel his intentions, if he has the potential to cut you down, place your roots firmly into the ground and don’t even show them that you are a fruit barer. Be kind, but stand your ground. Pour of yourself, but do not empty your own cup. And if you find yourself caught by surprise, worry not. To become spring, means accepting the risk of winter. Don’t hide because you’ve been hurt. The world needs hearts like yours!
I can relate to this. More often than not, I’m disappointed by people. It’s been like this since I was young. I’ve learned that most people can’t be relied on and will only disappoint you. As a defense mechanism, I don’t open up to people to make friends since I’m almost certain that the friendship will be over almost as soon as it began. I’d be lying if I said that I’m unbothered by the situation. However, I’ve grown accustomed to a certain extent with isolating myself and being reticent so it doesn’t bother me too much now. I’ve learned to be content with not having a plethora of friends. There’s a certain level of peace of mind and tranquility that comes with being a loner. I enjoy that peace of mind and find that too many interactions is a disturbance from that tranquil state.
I’m 54 now. I had two “friends” in my mid twenties. We all moved and lost track of each other. I’ve been let down and disappointed ever since. Looking back I really wish I would’ve kept in contact with them more than I did. That old saying, you’re lucky if you find one friend is so true. I think my blessings are over, because I don’t want to meet anybody new, but I encourage anyone if you are blessed to have that one friend. Hold on to them because they may be the only one you’ll get. Be blessed.
I worked in public safety where I was around the public (obviously)all the time. I really saw the worst in people most of the time. When I retired, I basically kept myself. I have dogs. I have my mom. I have one or two friends but nobody I let get close to me. I too, have been hurt by people who say they are your friends.(and boyfriend’s too)It just takes too much out of you to keep getting hurt over and over again. Self preservation is more important.
Solitude is golden. It means not having to listen to people tell you what they think you are doing wrong in life, especially people who haven’t done as well as you in life. I am thankful for what I have but have no use for others who try to belittle what I have accompllished when they have not done as well. Seems I have done better in life not listening to them try to put restrictions on me.
I think most people have a similar story about friends. Like most people, I have had lots of so called friends. I had a friend like this, I saved his life, he moved in with us until he got back on his feet. I formed a company & brought him on board . I gave him shares at no cost and all was going well. The business failed and I lost everything. He has never called me to even ask if I am ok ?. It’s made me realise that I see my best friend every day when I look in the mirror. Be kind to yourselves because you are your own best friend ever, the rest are just for decoration like a Swiss watch or gold cuff links. 👍
Not having friends shows that a person has many reasons not to trust people. Such a compassionate statement. It seems like not having friends is so many times blamed on the person who doesn’t have friends. I think sometimes we just are in a space of waiting on timing, after setting up a boundary with old unhealthy friends as so many of these comments share. If only we could all be in a room somehow that didn’t freak out all of us introverts. Surely a few of us could relate and maybe strike up a friendship.
I’m 61 and have been a widow for 3 and a half years. He was my best friend, the only person who truly knew me and saw me and never abused me like others and never hurt me on purpose. Yes he disappointed me sometimes as I’m sure I also disappointed him sometimes but our love and friendship runs deep and strong…even still. Some people are worth your time, most are not and I have only one friend now and that’s my sister. Most people won’t give you the time of day once you need a little help but as soon as they need something they soon show up.
Yeah. I got sick and tired of loving and caring so many times for people who’d rather keep walking side by side with “happier and less intense” friends than me… I was left alone because I wasn’t “sociable enough”. After a while, I learned that I was better off without them and also learned to treat myself better.
True friendship is probably one of the hardest things to come across and the most common mistake for people to make is to go looking for friendship, sometimes you are just lucky to have a “true friend” in your life. Remember, some people only show their true colours when you are at your lowest points in life…
I understand the apple tree. A few years back I had a wonderful friend after having been married to a man who never talked to me and was never fun to be with. He’d often say hurtful things to me. I had been so lonely, being married for 28 years to that man. We moved a lot, so by the time I’d make a new friend we were having to move again. One day he left, and I was glad he was no longer in my life. Several years after he left I met a guy who was so sweet, so kind, so thoughtful, so loving, and so much fun. I felt my prince charming had finally been sent to me. But after a few years he met some other women and he started to forget about me. Now he doesn’t talk to me anymore… he’s so busy with them. It broke my heart. I began to feel like the apple tree. Now as I go forward in life, I tell myself that God is perusal over me and caring about me. I kinda would like to meet a new friend who would be wonderful in my life, but I’m a little jaded!
This story comes from a story called ‘The Giving Tree’. It’s not about a tree that becomes cynical but about a tree that kept faith and spent its last days enjoying the company of his childhood friend. The tree was now a stump and the boy was now an old and tired man. The tree gave it ALL and the boy only TOOK. Do be careful with friends and family.
I have been a apple tree since childhood and now i am 61yrs old Unmarried and Fatherless, being the youngest of 8 children i am the poorest Relation with a loving heart and a open mind set. My Parents died 45yrs ago and i have no true friends, but my inner strength and resolve in dealing with disappointments has made me Content. I am a Sigma male with great knowing observing those around me who seem lost and unhappy with life.
I was friends with a band mate for 25 years, we toured the world in several bands. During his divorce I helped coach him through it. I even invited him to the Philippines to tour with me with my growing music career there. My friend got there, got jealous of my success, and quietly started planning his own career with other bands there. During this time, he talked bad about me behind my back. I warned him about prostitutes there also . In the end, he betrayed me for a prostitute. Lesson learned. She ended up cheating on him, getting pregnant, and using him for money. My mom once told me that everyone you think is your friend isn’t. Real fact. – Chicago Blues musician/ Nurse
i have few friends. When ever anyone questions me about this i tell them the less friends one has the less enemies one ends up with. i am my own best friend. I am the only one whom I can trust to always be there for me. i never let myself down and am always there when needed. I dont lie or cheat or betray myself. I listen better than anyone I know. Aside from God and Jesus there is no one who could be a better friend to me than me.
I can relate to this . I have no friends . I only have my family. Never really felt like I fit in with anyone. I’ve been hurt a lot and I don’t trust anyone. I talk to my family but that’s it . I used to want friends and I wanted to fit in and belong but I always felt like I was on the outside looking in . Now I just quit trying. All I have is my family!
I’m not particularly against making friends, I think friendship is the most beautiful thing one can have in a lifetime. But I just hate to bring drama to my life. Lately, every time I try to make a friend, some drama starts that could easily be avoided. I’m tired of being the therapist and peacemaker of my family who like to bicker at one another more than they like to eat so I’m not looking to add more instability to my life. I hope I find a friend who understands me and I understand them, have deep conversations with and joke around with and has no time to start drama with some petty crap.
I don’t have friends either. I did not have good experience with people, so I rather keep to myself. Sad thing in life is that people are not conscious, they’re not taking their time to talk to others, how to treat them properly. Ur most time afraid to confide in people u trust and open up to them, expecting them to only console you in ur hard times. Instead they listen to all u say then gossip about ur struggles.
Adults should talk more about this. There is a lot of lonely as well as solitary&satisfied folks walking around. I still feel the trauma of a toxic friendship and my own part played in ignoring my heart out of my code of loyalty. I am working on being loyal to my heart and those I trust with it. I am also learning to be ok with being selfish for my own mental health.
I felt that. . . Yes I’ve been that apple tree too a few times. Like the apple tree I grew again but I don’t regret anymore everything i did. Giving everything I had away to the ppl I loved. However I have learned some lessons. I still believe in love n sincere friendships but they are rare. I still want to make ppl happy by enjoying my apples because I’m an apple tree n that’s what I do. My lesson was not to give away all my apples n let someone take away my ability to give to other ppl. Maybe one day tho I will give it all away if someone really needs it. If I do I won’t expect anything in return I’ll do it because either they need it more than me or because I really want to. Great story thank u for sharing it 😊
So basically it’s the story of Shev Silverstein’s The Giving Tree. Friendship has degrees. I’m 52 and I’ve only kept a small circle of friends at any time of whom I truly trust and would call a friend. While I have many people who I care about and care about me, I understand that all those friends view their relationships with me differently according to their definitions of the term. Some are very open, some are transactional, some are true and others are fair weather. I have had several “best” friends throughout my life but they’re more fleeting relationships of convenience until they weren’t convenient anymore for one or both. Then there is the social media friends thing that defies sanity. Just understand that people are always looking to improve their own lives which includes the people they choose to spend time with. But it is when you are at your worst moments will you find out who your friends really are, like that tree that gave the boy everything when he was sad until it had nothing left to give.
My mother said this to me a few years back. You have certain people that come into your life for a certain amount of time for a particular reason and then their gone. I’ve noticed that is a true fact in my life, I’ve also learned that in true reality Jesus Christ is the one true friend that I will have forever.
I see friends as people who strengthen each other….without wanting to change each other. I need to go through good and bad times before I call a person a friend, it`s why true friendship takes time (jmho). Thank you for shining your bright light on a troubled world 💗 I wish everybody a happy and magical life 🙏
The moral of the story is true. I live w/o real friends because I don’t trust people. The ones that appear to wanna be friends only want something from you and once they get it…crickets. I’ve learned to do things for myself w/o anyones help. I deal with life as it comes and drive on. It’s no use to tell people your problems & secrets because one day it ends up on social media for the entire world to know. I have dogs and that’s good enough for me.
One day I was talking to God, asking to bring someone in my life because of loneliness … He said I’ve got to wait and trust in Him, because He’s the only friend I’ve ever had. He said “For 41 years I’ve been alone, so what difference does it matter now”. Well that was eye opening, and a sobering moment between me and God. The friends I thought I had never existed. The so called friends and family. Trust me, family hurts the most but prayer & Bible reading heals the hurt. Just wait on God, He knows what’s best for you and when you need it. 🖤🙏🏾
I was part of a click during my teenage years- thinking these people had my back. One of us passed away and one of them whispered to me during the funeral “do you really care?” – I snapped out of it, left the click during my early 20s. Through loneliness, I let one of them back in my life in my 30s, went on coffee dates, etc.. but then their lives started going sideways (due to their own choices) everything I have told them in confidence, turned it against me in a blink of an eye. I was there while they cried and yet your time is never enough. it’s hard to find a group of people to support you while you’re doing well. they feel they need to be part of your success even though they had nothing to do with it but your own strong will. and if you did, consider yourself lucky – but for the rest of us – keep going. You’ve done nothing wrong and know you’re doing what’s best for your own wellbeing ❤
This is genuinely powerful. it actually made me feel quite emotional. I’m 33 as of writing this and friends have come and gone in my life. In school I had a good group of friends but toward the end of high school things got in the way and dramas happened and we started to become different people. I was back stabbed in so many ways by so many people. I had one true friend who was more like a brother to me but he died in a crash when I was almost 18. Since then ive struggled to keep friends especially when I’ve had my trust broken so many times. I went from the sort of class clown funny one of the friend group to an introvert over the years. Now I work with a few younger guys and they all have a laugh and a joke and have inside jokes and stuff but I never seem to be a part of it. Part of me just likes to get my work done and be left alone but a part of me thinks it would be nice to feel included.
Maybe we just expect too much from people putting them in a “friend” box. If you don’t hold yourself to expectations, you can not be dissappointed. If I give something I don’t expect any return favours, I give it solely because I want to. I don’t have any “friend” of note, and I’m happy not to have to invest the time in this either. My dog is more loyal than any person could ever live up to.. talking about man’s best friend. There’s your benchmark right there for friendship 👍
My family were very strict on us kids about knowing who was an “Associate” and who were actually “Friends”. This included understanding that other family members are not automatically your friends. From this, I devised a really tough criterion for friendship: if one is willing to risk harm and/or death for your sake and you feel the same for them. I’m over 50 now and have a great number of Associates and a very small handful of lifelong actual Friends. It’s awesome 😊 I understand that these and other methods are not usable by all. I wish they were, though. It is troubling to me to read the stories of others commenting on this article, as so many describe the horrors that, unfortunately, come with some relationships. Everyone needs to have a “FOR CERTAIN I CAN TRUST THEM” person in their life.
Betrayal false promises and lack of loyalty. I no longer trust. I like this article, it resonates with me, and it’s a God send. I feel validated in my solitude, but also loneliness. I hear so often, surround yourself with positive happy friends. There’s never followup on where to find these mystical magical beings.
I’m 76 years old now and I have quite a number of friends, but I’ve been so depressed over a relationship with a younger woman that I think my friends don’t want to be around me because they can feel the sad energy emanating from me. I never talk to them about any of what I have going on with this woman, so that none of them know anything about any of it. I’ve been carrying the burden alone for several years. So it’s not like I don’t have friends, I just think that they’re avoiding me because I’m not the happy guy I used to be.
I love this story. The little boy being very self centered and exploited the tree to almost the death of a tree. The tree genuinely cared for the boy. I have met many people that desired to exploit me for their own gains. I don’t stop trying for friendships and I have a few genuine friends. As I have grown older, I am better at seeing the fake from the real. That is why I am here for you Simone.
“Even if you’ve known someone for decades, it only takes a day to return to being strangers. We met as strangers by chance, and we may separate. If we get along, then we’ll continue to meet. But if we don’t, then we’ll part. To meet and part is the way of life but to part and meet again is the hope in life. Don’t hold yourself back only to regret after it has passed. After all, every banquet in the world must come to an end, so everyone should have their fill while they still can.” I’ve been lucky/misfortunate enough to lose most of my friends to death, distance, and time. It probably is because I never seeked out friends after being abandoned by my peers for most of my childhood. My real friends stumbled upon me, saw something in me, and literally forced me to become friends with them. Once I saw their genuine nature, I paid them back 10 fold in ironclad loyalty. Betrayal sucks, but there is still a small comfort in being able to hate the person who has wronged you. To me, it’s easier to move on as long as you’re willing to trust again. Those sort of relationships are easy come, easy go. When deep relationships simply fade, the longing and loneliness seem to linger so much longer. Yes, true friendships are as rare as diamonds but yet they also don’t seem to be as indestructible as them.
Except for my parents I have never had anyone I would call a true friend. I know some people I am friendly with but that’s all. Truth is you never know anyone, which calls into question the nature of friendship and love. People feed off one another more often because they are lonely not because they particularly like one another. Psycho analysts describe love as a distraction from existential loneliness. People are not all bad but sadly some are more bad than good. Contentment and happiness can only ever come from within you and not from others.
If you’re strong personally and you are at the very least comfortable with yourself. And if you realize and admit to yourself that you are flawed but sincerely work to lessen those flaws, to be a better person for yourself. You may not have many friends either, because you recognize that others aren’t trying to do the same for themselves. Such people will not compliment your lifes ambition to be a better person. They will only make it more difficult for you to stay in track. So in this, being alone is a necessity. Until you can find a friend or someone who recognizes and empathizes with what your doing…maybe they’re doing the same. Unfortunately men, don’t really speak to each other this way. It’s too feminine for most men, because it requires acknowledging weaknesses and feelings of inadequacy. I’m an older man now and after all these years I have only 2 real friends, and I feel fortunate to have that many. Back in my younger, very social, partying days I had hundreds of friends all over the world. But then I got married and my wife became my best-friend. But she eventually became the boy in the apple tree story. She was always unhappy, she always wanted more. She loved spending money and buying new things. In my personal story I eliminated my wife and best friend from my life, and I cut myself down and built a boat. Then my life became my boat and I used it to escape. And I still have the boat…and 2 good friends.
Damn this one hit hard. I’ve been thinking it was something with me leading to not having friends. This opened my eyes and helped me realize due to all the times olive been used and abused by so called friends it has lead me to not trust people very easily. Maybe someday I’ll have one true friend but for now it’s me and my dog vs the world 🌎 😢😮
The story of the apple tree is really sad. I felt so bad for a tree who was willing to give everything to a friend who only showed up when things were not going well for him. When you are a good friend you have to make sure your friend group is not taking advantage of you. I have a tight circle because I want friends who are just there for me and the same thing back.
I was emotionally neglected from day one. I did not learn any kind of social skills and so became a pariah. As an adult I managed to find love and even marriage, but when a child was inside me, my spouse disappeared. I lived a decent life, making a good living from the skills I do have, and raised my child. Now he is grown and leaving soon, and I am alone again. And I am very, very sad.
A wise man once said you will only have 3 best friends in your life. One in youth, one in adult stage, and one in old age. My best friend I married, and can honestly say as an old man this is SO TRUE ….. most have been acquaintances and not true friends. I found out after being hurt so many times by so called friends to get a list of 10 questions I ask someone before we can even think about being friends. This test weeds out 99% of problems and it has stood the test of time for over 60 years. I will tell you just one, question #10 is will you die for me ? Sit and make your own list of questions to ask and don’t worry about pissing people off because it weeds out the nassersists and toxic people that come to destroy you.
I have had many betrayals now. The last one was a triple hitter. After that I just don’t even bother relying on people at all. I hang out for a bit with full awareness that the friendship will mutate sooner or later. Now when it does I don’t pay it any heed as I’m not so invested. It’s like “great “, “peace out”, “See you when I see you”. I learned people do whatever the hell they want when they want to do I’m not sacrificing myself anymore.
In my early twenties I was given a valuable lesson on ‘friends’. I indiscriminately called many of the people around me in life friends. Through a series of circumstances my naivete and illusions about what is a true friend were revealed. I came to recognize that the dozens and dozens of people I ‘knew’ were in reality, girls I was dating, co-workers, classmates, associates, club-runners, sports fans, and acquaintances. In the end I found out that I had three true friends and was blessed and grateful for their friendship.
This hits home hard. Grown familiar being alone and much prefer it due to what people have done. Aside from a *single person*, everyone just kept taking. Even when some where real, the second trauma kicked up, was just left entirely. Some went in to attack instead. Funny how I was always there helping and giving advice to those struggling and ignored when struggling myself.
Wow this almost brought tears to my eyes. It was very accurate for what empaths experience. I have been that tree too many times or judged incorrectly based on frivolous things that should never be an issue between friends. I’m very wary about others now and sadly, aside from my husband, no longer have any friends.
This is a very touchy subject because we are led to believe we need a bevy of friends to validate ourselves. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you establish a true or true friendships, you are fortunate and have worked hard at the task to do so. If you have no true friends, you are just as lucky. Just like the Apple Tree, you were probably used up! Being without discord, guilt, stress, jealousy, competition( etc. with “friends”) is truly a state of peace and delight!
I can honestly say that maybe in my life I can truly say maybe 2 or 3 people are true friends. I had so-called friends in my entire life who loved my kindness, generosity, time I gave them, listened all the time for hours to their problems, was patient, but rarely they reciprocated and often seemed disinterested or angry if I needed their time or help. Fair-weather friends. They are there when times are great but not when times are not so great. A true friend will be there always. Choose your friends wisely. You don’t have to change who you are to gain acceptance or be loved or even liked. Be yourself. Those who love you and really care about you without expecting or receiving anything in return are rare. Love you first. Still be who you are but don’t rely on others to make you whole. They should add to your life, not be it. Get a dog! Lol! They ‘ll never abandon you!😉
I’m 51 & the 3 people I consider friends I’ve known for 25+ years & aside from 1 the others live out of state…..having 3 true friends makes me feel lucky because you can usually count all of your real friends on 1 hand & have some fingers left over 😞I can’t explain it fully but a lot of folks are just…..shit 🤷🏼♂️🖤🥶
Wow… this really hits home for practically everyone. Life is a series of changes, which includes “friends”, and those changes can be personally recognized either as a series of “betrayals” or a series of fortunate demonstrations or “lessons”. Life Itself is constantly “talking” to us, if we would only pay attention to what It’s trying to say. Love everyone, but TRUST NO ONE (not even ourselves, because we’re constantly changing too). We should constantly ask ourself exactly how others might see us and feel about us personally. Things start getting really real with that kind of personal questioning. And, we should personally cease playing the role of “victim”. When we find that others do betray us, we should ask ourself why we allowed them to take advantage of us in the first place (there’s tremendous insight to be had with not habitually blaming others for our circumstances). We should cease trying to be the friend of others and, instead, our efforts should be towards being our very own truest of true friends. We should love ourself and be true to ourself. There is great love there, which is definitely not the ugliness of self centered egotism. Someone once said something like, “Be true to yourself and you can be false to no one else”. This, in no way, means taking unfair advantage of others. If others do get hurt by our actions and/or inactions, we should get back to them ASAP with offers of apologies and providing assistance. And, should others hurt us, without apologies and offerings of assistance?
This is also the life of the Chronic Ill or Invisible Disabled or Invisible Illness. You can’t do much, but you still have the old you that everyone else loved. They loved your humor, they liked to visit, they came to visit and talk… And relatives – they are our friends we didn’t choose. When you are ill, they seem to disappear also. perusal those with this Invisible Illness, they are so sick at first, then their illness stabilized. Stabilized meaning – they still are ill, but they have accepted, they have mourned, they have grieved at the lack of loss, then they have accepted and are ready. Research shows those who have valued friendships and relatives will recover easier and without as much depression, PTSD, and other mental illnesses. It appears that the less we are seen, the more we are forgotten. “Out of sight, out of mind”. A very sad situation our world has come too…overlooking the needs of those that love them and allowing them and their family handled grief and confusion alone. This is NOT a friend, and it is NOT someone who loves you. It was simply an acquaintance. They come and go.
I am in my late sixties, and have always been a loner. I have no regrets about it, and no real resentment towards others because of it. I do feel sad when I think about my very large group of siblings who, I have always felt rejected, and even scapegoated, me because I was different from them. Alone, I have travelled quite a bit of the world. Pursued many, many intriguing adventures. Discovered passion in education. Learned to love, and allow myself to be loved in return. I have found that, in countless ways, life can be wretched and painful, but it can also be blissful and oh so sweet. I’ve learned there are choices we can make to avoid some, thought not all, of those painful realities of being alive, and other choices that help us to open our hearts to the stunning beauties of life. Being truly comfortable in my solitude has been the most valuable aspect of my life, and for that, now, as I deal with the challenges of a terminal illness, I am most, most grateful.
I had some good friends that I kept after highschool. We would go clubbing and party at bars and stuff. And then one by one they each got married. And I saw them less and less. They chased after there careers as did I. We were all going in different directions career wise. You just grow apart and your friends change. I was always a loyal friend who kept the door open in case they wanted to come back. Like the apple tree. They started their families and moved on or moved out of state. I guess we are all just made differently. A friend is a friend for life in our minds. It’s a shame that I can’t share those good times and memories with them. I have to keep them to myself like a time capsule of my earlier life.
Unfortunately, most of my “friends” have actually been frenemies or just simply people who didn’t want to put the same efforts into the relationship that I did. But I’ve come to realize that I’m ok with this because it also means that I’m not constantly being inconvenienced by favors, monetary loans, babysitting, a personal counselor, etc. Luckily I have good family members and animal companions. P. S. One good way to get rid of these types is by calling on those “loans.” They’ll manage to disappear better than David Copperfield
This really resonates with me. Honestly, I don’t have friends. I don’t know how to judge people if they’re really meant to be my friend. That’s why I’m scared to say that I’m friends with them because I’m not sure either. That’s why in my 29 years of existence, until now, I don’t have anyone I can call a friend in my life.
I’m 25, in the military… literally joined a year after high school to be “on a team… surrounded by brothers in arms” and it was the complete opposite… everyone’s so individualistic and isolating… I’m afraid sometimes I won’t be able to make any friends again… I feel like the only one for sure who try’s to make plans… constantly have to message the people first to see if the plans are still happening or not… I would love to just be okay being alone but I get lonely and depressed sometimes from being alone and idk how to be okay with that… thinking about reading the Bible or trying to fill that void with Jesus and / or pets because I think animals are loyal companions.
This comment section gives me life. I’m constantly chastised because I have essentially no close friends, except for my cousin and his wife. I fire back that it must be lucky to not have family members that stab you in the back, or friends that are only around when they want something from you or put zero effort into the friendship. Real friends, real family – I’ll be there for you to the bitter end. Everyone else can blow off.
In my late 20s I just stopped interacting with people I knew, because I noticed they were all having children, starting families but not maturing mentally, they continued to behave as they did in highschool, and the impacts on the children were not the best, in my view. I then began to notice this was a common thing in society in general, The parents I was seeing everywhere, weren’t actually “parents” more like children who have children. Ive always had what many have called an unrealistic, and even extremely high expectations of people, that I am overly judgemental and critical of others, and this made me a jerk. In time I came to realize, this was/is the most self beneficial way in which people of low moral character can defend themselves, and avoid admitting their faults, or recognizing their flaws and then make an effort to improve. If people out as much effort into just being a good, decent, moral person as they do creating the image of being these things, they’d be great people. But that takes too much effort, it means they can’t just do as they please with no consequences or judgment. It takes constant effort to be a good person with decent morals, It’s much easier to just be a scumbag, it’s more fun to just be lude, crass, and behave inappropriately, trashy, even in the presence of young impressionable children. I came to view general society as trash, made up of selfish, self involved, ignorant, intentionally rude, unhappy/angry, immature people who have little regard or courtesy for anyone else around them.
That’s a very sad story with alot of meaning to it. People should remember this when they do have a friend who is loyal to them and stands by them. Just because you make new friends and live a good life doesn’t mean you should forget the ones who were there for you during sad times. That’s called loyalty and is an integral part of a friendship.
After the pandemic i realised there is no such thing as friendship, just political alliances. Step out of bounds of what’s considered normal; there goes your life long friends, primary school mates who have been with you through all your ups and downs. There goes everyone, all just because you didn’t inject some shit in your arm and advocated to have a choice for medical freedom.